This should have been one of the first posts published as it's one of the first things you do once you're engaged. I'm sorry, I'm only human! The guest list will help you browse through venues much faster. If you have a number, you can skip places that won't house that number. Huge help!
For Starters...
You, your fiance, his parents and your parents should each make lists of who to invite. Sounds crazy right? "I don't want my parents to dictate who comes and who can't!" Hear me out. You and your fiance will include your best friends and closest relatives. Your parents, however, will likely include family members whose names you forgot, the neighbors who babysat you for years and years, etc. Let them feel included, especially if they're paying for the big day.
Show No Mercy
- The Budget rules. Remember you'll be paying a set fee per person for the food if you're working with a caterer. If the money doesn't allow for 250 guests (the fantasy list), don't invite that many.
- Can't imagine getting married without them there? Keep them and move on to the next name.
- See anyone on your fiance's list who is absolutely not welcome? These names can include exes, his old roommate whom he doesn't really speak to anymore but you know will drink the bar dry.... you get the point. Same for you too though. You can't slash his list without letting him slash yours. Negotiate.
- Have you talked to them in the past year? Yes, this means your old high school, middle school and elementary school buddies and college roommates are out.
- Are they more like acquaintances? If the person is simply a friendly coworker or neighbor, cut them too.
- Kids or no kids? No judgement here, but if you go the no kid route, be sure that your guests are aware well in advance so they can hire a baby sitter and no hard feelings are had.
- Dates. This one's tough when it comes to RSVPs, but if you're looking to save money, don't allow for plus ones unless that person is in a committed long term relationship or is married. Casual dates are a no go, so be sure not to include "and guest" on the RSVP.
- Don't be pressured. Just because you were invited to their wedding doesn't mean they have to come to yours.
- The wedding funders get a say. Your parents and his parents may have people they want to see at the wedding. Let them have those people (in moderation of course), especially if they're paying the bill.
For the Visual Learners...
Check out this helpful guide by Simply Bridal.
- Adina
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